When I was in my 20’s I used to hear the song above and sing it out loud along with a good friend of mine. We used to have a good time just by driving around and enjoying our time together. The irony was that besides all the fun we had when we were ‘out and about’ both of us were struggling with our lives. I cannot talk about my friend’s feelings, but I can share mine.
Back then, like the song, I was constantly trying to be “somebody else.” Do you know that feeling? When you don’t know who you are? And you don’t know where you are going? That’s when that big question mark can either lead you to more understanding and growth or push you through an endless spiral of doubt and insecurity that can take your consciousness towards very unpredictable or suspicious places. And guess what, by having those so called “saboteur thoughts” I started believing them. I can’t say when that all started exactly, but probably it was during the early ages and without knowing I took the things I heard in the past too seriously. But how would I have thought or acted differently? When we feel insecure how can we have good thoughts? Hence we grow up and the things we heard/learned from the past have a great probability to mess up with our thinking patterns and whenever we see it’s there – telling bad things to ourselves that aren’t necessarily true. The result of this unconscious bad ‘self-hipsonys’ is that day after day if you say bad things to yourself, one day it becomes your reality. Therefore, your body starts to suffering the consequences of your mental patterns. It is said that by doing that repeatedly over time you can develop real pain and even illness. Isn’t it crazy? Who would have thought about that?
Nowadays there are many scientists, psychologists and the like around the world studying how our thoughts can design our own perceptions and thus affect our health and our outcomes. One of my favorite writers of all times is called Louise Hay. Starting from her childhood and until her teenage years Louise suffered all types of physical abuse and rejection; she could have had remained in pain and suffering as a victim throughout her life but instead she started studying how our emotions affect our body and also how to change our mental patterns. By practicing what is called ‘Power Affirmations’ in her own words – You Can Heal Your Life. And you know what? It’s not that you can “heal” your life, you are the only responsible for it.
I applied her method on me first and it worked out to the extent that I was needing at that moment. One day I started repeating to myself one of her power affirmations: – I love and approve of myself. I am safe. And just by doing that something really powerful started to happen to me. Besides all my “defects” I actually started paying more attention to my emotions and feelings, I started bringing more attention to my thoughts, my words and actions. And that doesn’t mean to be ‘self-centered’, ‘egoistic’ or ‘arrogant’, in fact I begun acknowledging my characteristics and the traits I have within me that were never put on the spot light. How great is that? We all have our hidden treasures that are eager to be discovered and appreciated.
Once you acknowledge your saboteurs – the thoughts you have running in the attic of your head – that say you are not good enough and that you don’t belong, you can rescue your self-esteem and come up with your own power affirmations. That’s even more effective than repeating somebody else’s affirmations. By now I don’t want to be nobody else but me. I can look at my weaknesses directly and work with them patiently. Honestly you don’t lose anything once you start saying good things to yourself. Just give it a try. I can say it’s a matter of time until you align your mental patterns with your words and actions, the good news is that there is no end line for that, you can see the change in your life blossoming along with this practice, but you got to be present for yourself everyday.
I really hope you give yourself a chance and embrace your thoughts more often, give it a try and commit to your own happiness. If that’s on you, why waiting?